Life, Pre-med, Volunteering

Change is Hard

Hi everyone!

I wanted to do something different today. I want to tell you guys a little bit about what’s going on for my life. I figured it’s still pre-med related, so I hope you all won’t mind. 🙂

I think I mentioned that I was starting a CNA program. I’m halfway done with it and it’s only been a week! 🙂 My instructor told me I was going through the course really fast, but I feel like I’m behind. I’m excited though; I think it’ll be a great opportunity for me to get some hands on experience with patients. There are a few things I’ve learned about that I’m not sure I’m comfortable with, but I’m sure once I get to do them they won’t be so bad. I’m hoping to start working on a hospital after I get certified, but I’m a little worried about working and going to school. I normally wouldn’t mind, since I’ve done it before, but I’m re-taking O-Chem I and I really don’t want to mess it up again. I guess I’ll have to put that fear aside and just push through it; I know if I concentrate enough and try I can make it work. I’m keeping my fingers crossed!

There’s also something that’s been on my mind for a few weeks. I mentioned in my Volunteer post that I’ve been with an animal shelter for four years and that I truly enjoyed what I was doing. It’s recently become very obvious that I cannot keep volunteering with them. They are a wonderful organization and they take care of their animals, but I don’t think they take me very seriously when I say I need help. My volunteer hours have also not been confirmed with my school, which is upsetting. I ultimately want to do what’s better for the cats, but I’m afraid there’s nothing else I can do. It’s a truly heartbreaking decision, but I feel it’s the right one for me at this point. I know I’m not giving you guys the full details of why I’m leaving, but I don’t think it’s appropriate to tell everyone what’s going on with the shelter. I’ve found another animal shelter I want to volunteer at; they have a kitten nursery and I think that would be a lot of fun. I will probably only do it once or twice a month, which will leave me with plenty of time to study while still satisfying my need to help animals.

I also mentioned I was doing volunteer work with a hospice. I enjoy doing it, but I’m going to find a different hospice patient. My current one was okay, but two weeks ago she started hitting me while I was reading to her, and it was kind of scary. I feel kind of guilty for having to tell my volunteer coordinator that I didn’t feel comfortable being around her anymore. The scary part wasn’t the hitting, but the yelling. She has a mental disorder, which made it hard to calm her down. She kept repeating the same words over and over and it scared me because I didn’t know what to do or how to help her. I hope it doesn’t make me a bad person for wanting to volunteer with another patient, and I know I’ll have more patients like this in the future, but at this point in my life I’m not feeling too comfortable with it.

A lot of doors are opening, but a lot of doors are closing. It’s a hard transition for me, but I’m hoping it will work out for the better. Change can be difficult, but that’s what life is all about. All we can really do is hold on, work hard, and keep trying.

Wish me luck!


2 thoughts on “Change is Hard”

  1. I worked in a hospice where all of the patients had mental disorders. It was one of my first experiences in being employed, as a CNA. It’s difficult but I did learn very much. No bueno, being hit.

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